The pandemic of 2020 has been interesting for our new family. 


My fiance and I had planned to get married in spring 2020, as well as have a baby. While we did get pregnant in fall 2019, we were not able to get married as planned due to COVID forcing closures of things like City Hall, where we wanted a small quick ceremony, followed by coming back to our home to have dinner and celebrate with family and friends. While we are still planning this, it is delayed, and likely will be just immediate family without extended friends to celebrate. We will have to see what the last half of 2020 brings, and maybe even into 2021. 


Having a baby during the pandemic has been incredibly tough for a few reasons. As the father, I was not able to attend any of the appointments, ultrasounds or the like after february 2020. This put a strain on myself, as I felt I was missing out on the entire experience of my first born baby girl. For my wife, she had to go through all the appointments, and tests alone, often by being dropped off at the hospital and having no real support during the experience, other than the support of the nurses and doctors. Not to mention the stress put on the grandparents as the things they would normally attend, ultrasounds, the actual birth, and such...they were not able to attend. 


Staying home while my wife got more and more pregnant wasn't very difficult, as she was most comfortable at home before anyways, but simple things like getting groceries became a challenge as often, not everyone at the store would follow social distancing guidelines. This added to the stress of a normal pregnancy as people who wouldn’t social distance risk myself getting the virus, which I was terrified to bring back and infect my pregnant wife with. Thankfully, our parents stepped in to do grocery trips sanitizing all food on delivery to our front door. This was one way they were able to help and feel they were supporting us through this time. 


On June 20th, 2020, my wife gave birth to our beautiful baby girl, Alexandra, named after my grandfather. The experience of my wife going into labour was odd, as when we arrived at the hospital, I had to wait outside while my wife waddled in so the nurses could confirm the baby was on the way, only then could I go park, grab all of our things, and proceed in myself. Once in, things went fairly normal for the delivery, but because a c-section was required, we had to stay at the hospital, in the same room, for 48 hours. If I had to leave for things like food at the cafe, I had to wear a mask. I was also not allowed to leave and re-enter the hospital, so only cafe food was available to me during that time. Anything we realized we had forgotten, like an extra pillow or blanket, was left at home with no chance to go get it. 


After coming home, we have felt a sense of isolation where we can't get the physical support they grandparents would love to offer us. They have stopped by for "drive-way visits", where they stay 2-3 meters back, but at least they can see their granddaughter in person. This helps a bit with the emotional factor of the isolation, but some help physically so we can get some sleep, would be nice. Although we do feel things are going well all things considered, it is not the experience we thought we would have for our first child. We expected a lot more family visiting, and celebrations with the help and in person support from our parents and siblings. Instead, we work through figuring out how to raise a newborn on our own, with the odd video calls to grandparents, and lots of pictures sent out to friends and family. 


Here’s hoping that if and when we decide to add another member to our family, the pandemic is no longer in effect and we can have the love and support from friends and family we were expecting the first time around.